1 Month with Asa

The first month with a new baby always feels like the longest month ever. Until it's over, and then you wonder where the time went. We are starting to adjust to life with 6. 

All the kids love holding Asa, as long as he is happy. 

 

Tanner dropped Bethany off at the airport the same day that he picked Grandma up. We were so grateful for all of Grandma Crossley's help. She cooked meals, did so many fun things with the older kids so I could nap, and even chased Josie down a few times when she escaped. Tanner also convinced her to stay longer as well. Basically, if you are coming to our house plan on Tanner trying to get you to stay longer.

And Asa must have been really sad about Grandma leaving because the very next day he started to be fussy. He isn't our hardest, but he also isn't our easiest. Luckily this isn't our first rodeo so his fussy spells aren't too hard to handle...most of the time. That one night where he was inconsolable through most of the night was a little rough; I may have shed some tears as well. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em right? So I've sworn off chocolate and it may help...at least we haven't had another night like that so I'm not going to risk it for a while. 

Asa took his first bottle thanks to Chet and Mariah. They have been such good helpers with him. 

Don't mind my hair-do...Eliza really wanted to take a picture. 

Asa went to church for the first time at the end of the month. The boys were so excited for him to wear his very own "Sunday shirt" complete with tie. He was amazing and slept all through Sacrament meeting and took a bottle for Tanner second hour so I could teach a lesson. 

We have a friend who is a chiropractor and he worked on Asa after church. We are grateful for "Doc" and his willingness to help. 

Asa has quite the receding hairline which makes us giggle. 

He is getting his nights figured out and usually goes down around 11 and sleeps until about 3 and then falls right back to sleep after eating and usually will sleep for at least two more hours. I'm grateful that he is sleeping so well at night because he is pretty high maintenance during the day. 

Vivi has done so well with "baby brother". There are the occasional eye jabs or plugged noses, but for the most part she just talks to him and lets me know when he is crying. She had a hard time adjusting to Dad putting her to bed at night but is getting better about it. She went to sleep last night without any tears. 

The first few months with a newborn are so full of contradictions. You are so overwhelmed with love for this sweet new spirit and have no regrets, but you're also so overwhelmed with everything else that goes with a newborn: your own body healing, exhaustion, helping siblings adjust, crazy hormones...it's quite the wild ride. You would think I would take it all in stride with it being my sixth but while I know it won't last forever, that doesn't mean it isn't hard. I have moments where I'm so proud of my "mother's intuition" but that seems to always be followed up with moments of overwhelm and inadequacy. And I'm learning that it's ok. Imagine Dragon's song It's OK has gone through my mind quite frequently:

It's okay to be not okay

it's just fine to be out of your mind

Breathe in deep, just a day at a time

'Cause it's okay to be out of your mind

And then I follow it up with I Feel My Savior's Love to remind myself Who will make it all okay. 

Maybe I'm supposed to feel this way so I know that I can't do it on my own. I hate asking for help, and maybe that is what makes the first month so hard for me. But this vulnerability is what helps me rely on the help of others and most importantly, it is what helps me to turn to my Heavenly Father. I can't do it on my own and that's ok. 

This isn't a cry for help, I have had so much help this last month, and we're adjusting well. I just think it's important for me to acknowledge that it isn't always sunshine and rainbows. Maybe this will help someone else one day, maybe even my own children when they are bringing their own babies home. It is such a beautiful, spiritual, emotional, exhausting, humbling, and especially joyful time and I'm so grateful to be able to do it again. As President Nelson has said, "...the joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with with the focus of our lives."

August

 August started in the best way possible, with a brand new baby. 

Brand new baby Asa

Tanner gave Amanda a good ol' guilt trip and got her to stay a few more days. I wasn't complaining about that and neither were the kids. That just meant a few more trips to the pool and other adventures. Plus she got some more time with Asa. 

Amanda took the kids to ride the Snakenburg's horses when I was in the hospital having Asa. It was the perfect distraction for the kids as they anxiously awaited the arrival of their baby brother. We are so grateful for good friends who are willing to share their horses with us. 

They had to show Aunt Mandy the Welcome Home Soldier Monument as well. 

Amanda made me a chocolate cake to celebrate my birthday. It was so delicious and I felt very loved. 

Birthday posters the kids made for me

Amanda made it so fun for the kids. She took them to the pool and out for ice cream multiple times. And she even managed to make freezer meals for us as well. She left pearler beads for them to work on and it kept them busy for several hours. We were all real sad to see her go. But having Bethany still here and knowing that Grandma would be here in a few days helped. 

I finally had to say goodbye to Bethany. I'm not sure why we couldn't convince her to stay forever. What single 18 year old wouldn't want to live in rural Iowa? But really, she was so amazing. She made delicious meals, so much bread (including amazing, artisan sourdough loaves), played with the kids, took them to the pool, made me delicious date balls and protein balls, made cheesecake, gave me foot massages, and was just so very helpful. She is going to be such a great Doula and I'm so grateful to have her in my life. 

Grandma took the kids on lots of adventures too. They went to the Mahaska Learning Center, Red Haw Lake and swam at Lake Rathbun with the neighbors. She went with Tanner and the older kids to the State Fair as well. Tanner kept sending me videos of all the pretty horses and it made me so happy. 

 Grandma made us delicious meals and took the kids to church when Tanner was on call. We were so grateful for her and all that she did. She really is the best. We were sad to see her go and are counting down the days until we see her again. 

We had a day of cooler temperatures, I think it was around 68 degrees, and the girls had to wear jackets outside because it was "bursing cold". 

The older kids played at the neighbors' house one day and got creative. They were very proud of the different human pyramids they made. Trey had to send me some pictures. 

Austin set the table for me and decided to get fancy. He even labeled the dishes of food and wanted me to take a picture for dad to see. 

We've had a bug going slowly through everyone. Asa has stayed healthy though and I'm praying it stays that way. 

The boys make sure we don't forget Mario Cart on Saturdays. 

When Miss Robin from our HSAP dropped off our books for the school year, she also brought a meal, and multiple treats. One thing she brought was a bag full of different apples and caramel. She wanted the kids to try each of the apples and decide which was their favorite. She even included the receipt so they could see the different prices. I was feeling sorry for myself the first solo Sunday evening because Tanner was gone at a church meeting and Asa hadn't slept much the night before. But then I decided I could choose whether I was going to be grumpy or not. So we got out the apples and had a taste testing party. We decided the Braeburn (the cheapest) was our least favorite and the Honeycrisp (most expensive) was at the top. It was a really fun activity! 

On the last Saturday of the month, Vivi fell off the chair she was standing on at the island and split her chin open. She was being oh so helpful cutting up watermelon on the counter, and I had just come in and was starting to clean up the mess without realizing she was still holding the knife. So her injury could have been much worse. 

As Tanner and I were taking her to the clinic I jokingly said, "We get to go on a date!" And Vivi got really excited and kept saying, "We're on a date!". When she laid on the table, Vivi looked up at the big light and said, "Wow, thats a big doctor". So then I tried to explain that Dad was the doctor, but I'm not sure she really understood. But she held so still while Tanner fixed her up and it has healed quite nicely. So grateful for those Doctor privileges we have.